Easter!
Family Updates, April 2023
River has taken on more responsibilities around the apartment. He helps by putting our shoes away when we get home, he sets the table, wipes the chairs after dinner, helps me make Elles’ bottles, throws diapers in the trash, and even zips my dresses up in the morning before we leave for work/daycare.
River is working on sharing with his sister, which is understandably frustrating. When he takes out a toy to play with, speedy Elles is there immediately, ready to take part of what he’s enjoying and insert it into her mouth. She loves to be around her brother at all times and she finds him endlessly hilarious. For his part, River loves being around Elles as well. He’ll often wake up and say “Put Elles in my crib, Mommy,” usually after saying, “Where’s Daddy at?” However, his patience often runs thin when it comes to his sister taking his toys. Sharing and patience with younger siblings are challenging skills, but he’s working on it every day, and doing a great job.
River still loves to read. He also continues to show his exceptional memory. He can recite my phone number, all the X Men and their real names and every Star Wars character, from the major to the obscure.
Eleanor is a speedy crawler now. She also clearly wants to stand, skipping the pulling herself up phase and attempting to stand from a seating position like a sumo wrestler. She doesn’t, however, realize that she can roll over. She skipped that phase completely, and will lay on her back and whimper if she wants to get up, instead of rolling over and pushing herself up, which I’m sure she has the strength for. She can also say Dadada, Nanana, and Tatata. She is a piglet and loves to eat her mush. River also loves to share Eleanor’s mush with her.
When I returned to work in February, Pop Pop started watching both kids, a task Bud and I were leery about, although Pop Pop was confident he would be fine. He was right. Pop Pop and the kids spend eight or nine hours together every Wednesday, a day River looks forward to every week (his first words on these days are often “Pop Pop is coming!”)
Bud has been busy training. He starts his runs while most of us are still asleep, leaving before 4am to drive to and run in Fairhaven. He runs distances on the weekend that seem unreal, last Saturday running 21 miles, the Saturday before, 22. He’s also done a deep dive into Ancestry.com, spending many nighttime hours after the kids are asleep researching historical records to learn more about his ancestors. He’s contacted distant relatives to ask for stories of his great and great great grandparents and their children. The history of these intrepid Azoreans who left their home country for either New Bedford or California, many with kids numbering in the double digits, is fascinating. We are even attending a family reunion this summer with people who, before Bud started this venture, we had never heard of. Bud also continues to be the prime family photographer, documenting every family outing and cute moment in our home.
I had an easy transition back to work, much easier than with River. I am feeling healthy, as well, and I enjoy exercising before the kids wake up in the morning while listening to my National Park After Dark podcast. I’m loving the warmer weather and being able to take the kids outside for walks on the weekends. I’m dreaming of summer. It’s just around the corner.
Good Friday was a very good Friday! Bud and I dropped the kids at Ms. Lori’s. We went out for an amazing breakfast at Hangar 12 in Mansfield. Then we hiked Blue Hills and ran errands. Meanwhile, the kids were having the best day, taking a spontaneous field trip to the fire station and having a dance party in the town green! River even got to sit in the fire truck!
Elles makes a new friend- Fan Droid!
April 18, 2023
RIVER DID POO POO ON THE POTTY!
River, The Equestrian
This weekend, we went to a daycare friend’s birthday party, and at the party, there were horses! All the kids’ birthday parties we have taken River to have been inside halls and he is usually very shy, either clinging to us, or venturing off to play, but only with a parent by his side. This party was at a horse ranch, and it was hard to keep track of River. I think he ran around the entire party, not showing any fear from being away from us. In fact, it was hard to keep up with and keep track of him. Thankfully, we also had the children of the owner of the daycare we attend who are very sweet. They are eight and nine, now, I think, and they are so great with the kids. They took turns playing with the daycare friends that were attending the party, and Lori’s son, Austin, especially, was happy to run around with River.
Finally, though, it was time to ride the horses. River had to wait in line with a bunch of other two and three year olds, an age not known for their patience. There was a chorus of little voices “I want to ride the horse” followed by adult “you will ride the horse” responses. River was very patient. He was the last to have his turn. Some of the kids began to cry when they finally were placed on the horse’s back, and I worried this would be River’s response, but he couldn't have been more natural and confident and brave. He turned to Bud carrying Eleanor and exclaimed, “I’m riding a horse, Elles!”
As River sat atop the horse, a business-like look on his face, Hannah asked him cheerily, “Do you want to walk?” River said firmly “No.” This meant, no, of course I don’t want to walk. I want to sit on this horse while he walks. So Hannah explained, yes, that is what she meant, and she walked him in a circle around the corral. When his turn was over, he of course asked if he could go again. We left the party sleepy, dusty, and smelling slightly like horses, but it was a great day.
April 16
This was another one of those every day moments that brought tears to my eyes. We had had a very long day. We were out later than expected, and it was past dinner time. Both kids secured into their stroller, I brought out two pouches of apple sauce, one for each kid. River sucked his down, and I held Elles’ for her as she clumsily and messily ate her share. River finished his first quickly and asked for another. I had one more, and I gave it to him. Meanwhile, Eleanor finished hers and began to cry for more. I turned to River, sitting on his side of the double stroller, and said, “River, can Eleanor have some of your pouch.” He replied firmly, “no,” clearly not wanting to sacrifice any of the precious elixir. I said, “River, Elles finished her pouch and she is still hungry. Can she have some of yours?” expecting, of course, that he would whine a bit and say no, and I’d have to make a quick decision whether to make him share or let him finish what he started. Instead, he paused, looked over in Eleanor’s direction, then at me, and held out his pouch for me to share with his sister. I didn’t think two year olds, notoriously selfish creatures, had the capacity to reason, “I want to eat this pouch. It is delicious apple sauce and I am hungry. But my sister is crying and she is hungry, too. So I should give her some of my apple sauce, and I will have less.” We are so proud of our little boy. He is becoming more and more mature every day.
April Vacation!
New Bedford Whaling Museum
While out at a cafe, Bud and I mentioned that we liked the chairs and would like to get a similar one for our apartment. As we were leaving, River began attempting to drag the chair out with him. I scolded him lightly, telling him to put the chair back where he found it. He replied, “But we need it for our home.” Our boy is always listening!
Eleanor may be the most accepting, tolerant baby. Even today, Elles spent hours in the car and in the stroller. Normally, she would sleep in these situations, but a baby can only sleep so much. We were finally driving home, and Eleanor had clearly had enough of the car. But she didn’t cry. She just maintained dissatisfied eye contact with me through her mirror, thumb aggressively in her mouth, for the entire hour long drive home.
However, although she is go-with-the-flow, she also has no problem with expressing her will. If I place her down so I can prepare a meal or do the dishes, if she is not happy with not being held, she will crawl over to me, pull on my pant leg, and cry until I pick her up. Then she will immediately smile, having won.
Plymouth
After a day out in Plymouth, Bud and I said we were going home. River said, “I’m going with you guys.” We reassured him, yes, of course you are coming with us. Even when you’re grown, we will still invite you to come with us wherever we go. We will say, “Hey River, we’re going to some place. Do you want to come?” River thought for a moment about our reply and said, “And River will say ‘yes!’”
Boston
After we got home from another long day, Bud and I did what we always do. We lugged in all the stuff from the car and then returned to get the kids. When I opened River’s door (we had left him for about thirty seconds), he said, “I was crying for you guys.” I picked him up to carry him inside. He wrapped his little arms around my neck and sighed, “I’m so happy now. I’m so happy.”
River loves hugs. He will cling to our legs, ask Bud to “cuddle” him while we eat, or, if it seems that anything is amiss, will hug us and tell us, “You’re okay, Mommy,” “You’re okay, Daddy.” He is the sweetest boy.
Upon coming home and learning from Pop Pop that River used the potty, I told River how proud I was. He responded, “You are loving me so much.”
Later, I told him if he didn’t listen, I would put him in time out. He said, “I’m not a bad guy. I’m not a trickster. I’m not Loki.” (He learned this from his Thor books, not from studying Greek mythology, but still.”